Something HOT for Game Day- YUM

Welcome Clever Tribe!  If you caught me on ESPN Radio this morning with Erin Hogan, here are the recipes I promised.  Don't be intimidated- you won't believe how easy this stuff is to prepare and can be done ahead of time.  The key to game day grub is ease and taste.  

If you didn't catch me on the Bud Light Morning Rush- go to www.espnaustin.com and download the software.  It looks like (for the time being) I have secured a 10-minute segment discussing football and food.  See you next week at 8:45 a.m.  X

Sicilian-Style Shrimp

Place a pot of water on to boil

You will need ice later, so make sure you have some at the ready

1 lb. of peeled and deveined 20-ish count fresh shrimp (from the seafood counter- not frozen in a bag)

To peel and devein shrimp- remove legs. This will open the shell so you can peel it off. I pull the tail from the very end. There is quite a bit of meat in there to be preserved and it looks nicer when they are cooked. Slice the back of the shrimp open from one end to the base of the tail and expose the, well, we will call it a vein, and remove it. Don't cut too deep or you will "butterfly" the shrimp, which is neither here nor there, it just cooks faster and looks differently.

In a large bowl combine the juice of five lemons, a quarter cup of olive oil, kosher or sea salt, a teaspoon of oregano or "Italian spices." Let the spices unfurl a bit while you are cooking the shrimp.

Once the water is boiling, put the shrimp in. As soon as it all turns pink (no longer than four minutes)- remove the pot from the stove and drain contentst in a colander (the thing with all the holes you use to drain pasta). Quickly cover the shrimp with ice- seat the colander in the pot and run cold water over the shrimp. This set is critical because the shrimp WILL CONTINUE TO COOK IF IT IS NOT COOLED. Let the shrimp sit in the cold bath until they feel completely cold.

Add the shrimp to the lemon and oil mixture. Now, if you double or triple the shrimp amount- increase the lemon and oil accordingly. Put this in the fridge for up to two days and serve with the liquid drained.

Meatball Subs

Two large cans of tomato sauce into a crock pot

Add a generous amount of dried oregano

Add a generous amount of garlic powder

I like to add some cayenne pepper, but I like it HOT

Set on medium heat

In a large bowl, combine 2 lbs. of ground beef

1 cup of Italian bread crumbs

½ cup of egg substitute or 2 large eggs

½ red onion, chopped small

5 large leaves of fresh basil, chopped

3 cloves of garlic, minced

I think the most critical aspect of this meal is the bread.  You are going to want to head to Whole Foods or Central Market and find a really hearty Italian bread.  Do NOT go with a hoagie roll or sub roll unless you want this to turn into casserole after the first bite.  Nobody wants a wet, soggy mess.

Mix with hands (use gloves if this is a repellant concept), then begin making small- to medium-sized meatballs and add them to the sauce. Cook on medium-low until you are ready to eat.

Once the meatballs have cooked for five hours on medium heat they are ready, however, if you are So Very game day CLEVER, you can do this during the week and put them in the refrigerator until Saturday (or Sunday if you like that PRO stuff).  Turn it on low and it can go until you are ready- if it seems to be getting too hot, put it on "keep warm."

When you are ready to serve- cut your bread down the middle from the side to open it up flat. Broil it until it is lightly browned- take the inside out of the bread to make room for the meatballs.

Fill the larger hollowed out side of the bread with mozzarella cheese and then meatballs. Cover with sauce and close (or broil it a bit so the cheese is melty). Cut in half and serve. Yum.

So Very Clever Update and Game Day Grub

Welcome soon to be So Very Clever readers.  I hope you were able to catch me this morning on ESPN Austin with Erin Hogan.  If you did, here are the recipes I mentioned on the show.  Enjoy!  Just print them out and hand them off to the So Very Clever Guy's Girl in your life.  If she looks at what you're handing her like it's a used bed pan, you have two options:  Get a So Very Clever Guy's Girl- or steer your girl to this blog so she can learn some tips for becoming a Guy's Girl.  

Pork Tacos

1 package of pork tenderloin (should contain two tenderloins)- not pork roast

salt

pepper

garlic
ground cumin
20 tortillas of choice (use whole wheat from Central Market if you are health-conscious)

HOW TO PREPARE THE PORK
The great thing about this dish is the pork can be grilled or baked (either way, pork should always end up at 170 degrees). If baked- go with an oven temperature of 350 degrees. Season pork liberally with salt, pepper, garlic powder and cumin.  Once cooked, slice and serve hot or cold with tortillas.

BBQ Coleslaw
1 head of green cabbage

1/2 each red, yellow and orange pepper (you can use the other half from Texas Caviar - see below)

Jalapenos
1 bunch of cilantro

1/2 red onion

1 bottle of Kraft Original barbecue sauce

1/3 cup Kraft Light Mayo reduced-fat mayonnaise (or regular fat, if preferred)

cider vinegar

white pepper

1 packet of Splenda

HOW TO PREPARE THE BBQ COLE SLAW

Core the cabbage and slice ultra thin (shred). Julienne the peppers.Cut the japs into rings- core if you don't like the heat.Coarse chop the cilantro after rinsing.Slice half of the red onion- thin. Add the Splenda, a dash of white pepper and a generous portion of the barbecue sauce to the mayonnaise Now, if you want to doctor your Kraft Original barbecue sauce- add to it-

Garlic powder -1/2 tsp
Worcestershire sauce - 1 tsp
Tabasco- a liberal dash, based on taste, for heat
Cayenne pepper - 1/2 tsp
Chilli powder - 1/2 tsp

Feel free to use your favorite barbecue sauce instead. Mix this well and pour over the cabbage mixture. I use my hands to make sure it is well coated. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

TEXAS CAVIAR
(having nothing to do with fish or fish eggs)

This fantastic recipe was introduced to me only last year by Charter Member of the Clever Tribe, Julie. Born and raised in the Dallas area, she has exposed this Yankee Clever Girl to all kinds of fabulous cuisine.

2 cans of black-eyed peas (no bacon), rinsed

1 can of black beans, rinsed

1/2 each red, yellow and orange pepper, diced
1/2 red onion, diced

3 pickling cucumbers, unpeeled and diced bite-size (be sure to wash well first!)

Jalapenos, sliced
Your favorite Italian dressing- I like to make Good Seasons (red wine vinegar and oil)
1 tomato, diced (I add this at the last minute before serving so the tomatoes hold their shape and look fresh)1 bunch cilantro - rinsed, picked and chopped coarsely (I like to add this right before serving because it looks nicer)
Tortilla chips


HOW TO PREPARE TEXAS CAVIAR

In a large bowl combine the black-eyed peas, black beans, peppers, onion and cucumbers, plus as many jalepenos as desired. Add ¾ s of a bottle of your favorite Italian dressing. I am partial to making Good Seasons in the little glass cruette. When you make it healthy, use 2/3 red wine vinegar, almost a third of heart-smart oil (I like Enova) and a splash of water- plus seasoning packet.Shake, then pour over your Texas Caviar. Stir in tomato and cilantro. Chill and serve with a variety of chips- the baked Scoops from Frito-Lay are perfect.

. . .

OK, Clever Tribe- I'm now responding to the "Where TF have you been"s.  As I recall, I believe in May, I made clear I was coming into a season that would prevent me from posting daily.  I'm in the final editing stage of "Consumed."  I've been filming the trailer for the novel, creating the website for my fiction, reworking the So Very Clever platform, and shooting author interviews and podcasts (please don't ask me what these are- I'm filming them and still have NO idea). I've been doing research to position my children's book series with the right agent/publisher, researching Book Two (as yet, unnamed) and managing Clever.

Because I felt I wasn't busy enough (don't forget I'm a professional photographer)- I decided to become a contributing sports writer for Bleacher Report- the most well organized online sports magazine I've seen. Now, don't expect me to spew facts, figures, stats or numbers- why?  Because none of that matters when the two teams take the field.  Emotion is a factor, coaching is a factor, if your dad is kind of famous seems to be a factor, politics- it's just not as easy as your batting average.  Life is coming at me right now- up to 105.4 mph (football, baseball and then hockey beats baseball by .4) so I have to stay on top of things.  You will be happy to know, Bleacher Report was open to my So Very Clever method by which to immerse women into the sports realm, so ... I have decided (after consulting my wise counsel, Erin Hogan from ESPN Austin) to do a twice weekly "Top Five Clever Topics for Guy's Girls."

As is typical with So Very Clever- I am going to give you the broad strokes- this will get you by and allow you to generate intelligent and insightful conversation, but I would recommend you do a little more research if the men/man in your life is a big fan of one of the teams in an upcoming game.  I will run similar content here, but would rather you read at Bleacher Report- they are watching me.

Again- bored here- nothing to do, so I agreed to be a weekly contributor on the Bud Light Morning Rush with Erin Hogan on The Horn in Austin.  That is if they decide I am worthy after my first segment today.

Clever Girls can capitalize on an at-home game day by wearing something a little sexier- a higher heel, because you won't be beating a path to a stadium or tailgate party- a tighter jean, because you will be up and down- and maybe short sleeves.  You don't have to worry about humidity, so go ahead and whip out the flat iron.  I prefer curly- big surprise.

XXX

What You Got Under There?

I was asked by a gentleman who is So Very Clever to comment on what currently is being called the "maxi-dress"- we’ve all seen or worn them. The long, often shapeless dresses- either with straps or without. This particular fashion AND figure conscious guy asked me to tell you ladies that nine of 10 dudes are saying, "Thanks for the look at your breasts but despite that, all we can think about is what you are hiding under there."

I burst out laughing when he said this because it makes sense.

Here’s a tip for wearing these fabulously comfortable and often quite stylish little numbers. If you are heading out socially- do not wear one. These should be reserved for women in relationships- when your guy already knows what lies beneath it can be very provocative for him to be denied a glance at your gorgeous legs, your perfect ass or even that fantastically flat abdomen. Always appreciated will be the generous cleavage most of them showcase.

This fear is extended to the "baby doll" top. While designed to offer some tantalizing glances at your breasts, men fear the muffin top underneath. So, when you head out on a first date, a blind date, to a game with friends or any social occasion- chose your attire wisely. Put your best features on the marquee.

Avoid Fish Shrapnel- It's Gross

Way to go Clever Girls! You made it through the grilling series and here is your reward. The sacred salmon recipe. It's perfect for this weekend and good luck!

Grilled Salmon with Salsa Verde

Wild salmon (I don’t use farm raised)

20 limes

Sea salt

1 to 2 bunches of cilantro (depending on the amount of salmon and the number of people) pick through to make sure you have removed wilted or bad leaves and take the thick stems off completely. The more slender stems are OK for blending. I cut off about one inch of the stems prior to rinsing in a colander.

2 to 3 fresh jalapenos

1 to 2 cans of black beans

1 jar of Mrs. Renfro’s salsa verde

1 to 2 packages of Casbah Toasted CousCous (pearl pasta)

2 to 4 cups (two for one package of couscous- four cups for two packages) of chicken stock

½ of each- red, yellow and orange pepper, julienned

Black pepper

Garlic powder

Juice all but one lime (save for garnishing yummy Mexican beer)

Women who Eat are Tres Sexy

Clever Girls- are you bored yet? Don't quit on me now! This is it. The last day and it isn't even educational. Below you will find ways to dazzle your guys with talk of hot coals, grill marks, medium rare plus, fire, heat and of course ways to lure him in. If you questions about cuts of red meat- check out the post in Clever In the Kitchen about MEAT and dining in steakhouses. One of the most Clever Guys I know, Tom Walters guided me through the critical items women MUST know when it comes to both.

Let's Talk Grilling

It's so easy to impress a man with talk of food, but what is more impressive to a man is a woman who ENJOYS cooking, will cook for him and, ta-da, knows not only how to operate a grill, but owns one.

Fire it Up

This is my first endeavor into a series- which kind of freaks me out. If you don't like the content- you won't come back until the series is over- Friday by the way. I'm trying to make this the least boring I can- though, if you are not one who likes to be in the kitchen- you might want to rethink that. Cooking is a sensorial experience. The scents, the flavors, the heat and if you never have- split open a blood orange and without preparing it- lower your mouth to it and take a bite. Such pleasures await!

I simply can NOT overstate the appreciation men feel at being cooked for. If you are not DOING it- DO IT. If he is not appreciative- he's NOT Clever so move on. If you are really lucky- he will sit, with a glass of wine in the kitchen with you and chat- his eye trained on your backside wondering when a good time would be to take you to the floor or press you against the counter top and lavish you with lingering kisses.

For my young and lovely readers. The kitchen is a fantastic place- get to know it and it will serve you well. Laine, your mother is one of the most compelling cooks I've ever met- learn from her- she has much to teach.

Prepare to Prepare the Grill- Bring a Bag

If you are arriving late to this series- we are embarking upon grilling. This is the second post, the first was The Yet to be Discovered Art of Grilling- Tres Clever. So, check it out and then get ready to get your hands dirty- if you have a charcoal grill it's almost an inevitability.

Preparing the Gas Grill

Gas grills use natural gas or propane, which can be purchased in tanks from most large grocery stores. Most grills have a low fuel indicator so you are less likely to run out mid-meal- which, in addition to being massively inconvenient pegs you as a novice griller. Gas grills generally use lava rocks and it’s a good policy to allow your grill to burn for 10 minutes or so after removing the food to burn off excess fat or food particles. This makes for fresher grilling next time. Rocks do need to be replaced over time and that should be before they turn into ash.

The Yet to be Discovered Art of Grilling- Tres Clever

Ok, Clever Tribe, it's great to be back at it. I've had the opportunity to spend some time with some fantastic college students, so I'm looking forward to touching on some subjects highly relevant to the 18-24 age group.

First, we need to talk about something CRITICAL. I finally figured out how to read my analytics. With the help of a Very Clever Guy named Jason- I have come to realize my readers are reading about one and a half pages of my posts- the posts are generally three to four pages long- this statistic tells me you are getting BORED halfway through. I can’t have that. So, I am going to experiment with shorter posts. It might interrupt my train of thought, as I do like to let things unfurl a bit.

Pam brought it to my attention that while she signed up for e-mail notification of new postings- she has never received an e-mail. Jason and I reinstalled the FeedBurner application, so please sign up again and let me know it if it's working. Be sure to check your spam folders for the e-mail you'll need to respond to in order to complete the process.

So, today we are going to discuss grilling for the Clever Girls and even the Clever Guys who don’t yet grill. I will be breaking it up into several posts. Next week you can count on some Clever commentary on the lack of self-respect among young women and a couple of Clever Wedding Planning Tips for the selection of THE DRESS.

A cooking woman is sexiness personified, but a woman who can grill? Men enjoy being catered to, so what better way to show you care than to prepare food for him. Don’t fume if he doesn’t want to join you in the kitchen, don’t lament the playful photos in Cosmo, where the kitchen agenda amounts to sexual-encounter-destroys-dinner. Instead, pick a night when you know there is a game or program you don’t care to watch and make it your mission to fuss over him.

More Clever Gifts for Clever Guys

OK, Clever Girls, I've decided to do a monthly post regarding Clever Gifts for your Clever Guy and some tips as to how to let your new guy know he is not only welcome to stay over, but spend the weekend.

Also this month will be Clever gifts for Clever Girls and I will do this monthly, because frankly, I don't know a dude who is going to buy a gift further than one month out. I'll always put the hyperlinks in so they don't have to wear themselves out shopping.

If you're satisfied with his skin and hair care products, purchase them along with a toothbrush and a nice razor. If you’d like him to try some newer, healthier products check out Jack Black, Kiehl’s, Molton Brown, Dr. Copeland skincare and Aveda.

All f the above lines specialize in men’s skin and hair health, most include oft overlooked exfoliators, sunblock and lip care. I am a huge fan of Kiehl’s as I’ve said before- their simple and prescriptive packaging just makes me feel like I am doing something good for my body and hair- even though I truly am.

Steer clear of anti-aging items unless he has specifically asked you for advice in this arena- as well as you should not stock your cabinets with Rogaine for men.

Fiesta or Siesta? Siesta First- then Fiesta and Fajitas

As promised- here are a few recipes for the weekend. As I've noted before- I prefer to use whole wheat tortillas- from Central Market if possible, Whole Foods if not. I also enjoy freshly made corn tortillas. Whatever your tortilla preference- enjoy.

I hope Geoff doesn't give me a hard time about these recipes- but I am sure he will. So you know, I was challenged to a Guac Off by one of the most Clever Guys I know- and I won (though the runner up's guacamole was fantastic as well).

Fabulous Fajitas

Before you leave for work you can get this marinating in the fridge and it will be perfect by the time you build that fire. The number of people you are cooking for will determine the the amount of each needed.

Boneless, skinless chicken breasts

Skirt steak or sirloin fajita beef

Shrimp (peeled and deveined) is an added option

1 to 2 light beers, depending on the amount of meat

Salt, pepper, garlic powder and ground cumin

Worchestershire sauce

Trim excess fat off meat (but not too lean on beef - the fat helps tenderize and flavor the meat). If you do use shrimp, place them on wood or metal skewers. Season liberally with the above dry seasonings. Place in a deep container or pan. Apply a generous amount of Worchestershire sauce and then slowly pour the beer (s) into the corner of container (so it doesn’t wash the seasonings off the meat). Meat should be close to submerged and refrigerated. As soon as you get home from work, flip the meat and let it continue to marinate.

If you want to add veggies, use green or red peppers and sweet onion, cut into chunks, skewer them on any form of skewer and add to the grill just before you flip the beef. Cook 2-3 minutes on each side.

Grill over direct heat for 3-4 minutes each side for beef and 6-15 minutes each side for the chicken, depending on the thickness. Slice into long strips and serve with fresh, warmed tortillas.

Greatest Guacamole

2 large, ripe avocados (should be slightly soft to the squeeze- not hard and not squishy)

Cilantro - wash and coarsely chop half a bunch

Juice of 1 large lime

Sea salt - to taste

Ground cumin - ½ teaspoon

Red onion - half of medium - coarsely chopped

Fresh garlic - 2 cloves, finely chopped

Fresh jalapeno - optional, coarsely chopped

I like to add a tablespoon of Mrs. Renfro’s salsa verde (most any green salsa will suffice), but it is not necessary. Do not use roasted salsas unless you enjoy a smoky flavor.

Take a knife and cut avocado to the pit all the way around, twist each side and pull one side off, exposing the pit. Holding avocado half in hand, take the knife and gently but forcefully chop into the pit short ways. Leaving the knife lodged in the pit gently turn knife handle until the pit dislodges from the fruit. Take knife and cut slices into avocado (while still in the shell) from top to bottom and then the other direction in a crisscross pattern. Take a large spoon and remove pre-cut fruit from shell into a large bowl.

Place all of the above ingredients into the bowl of avocado and stir until the desired consistency has been achieved.

Add one coarsely chopped tomato last so it is not destroyed during the mashing.

I prefer to double this recipe and have it available with a great baked chip when my guest(s) arrive. The remaining guacamole should be served with the fajitas along with sour cream, mixed grated cheese and salsa (fresh or purchased)

Quick Salsa

1 can of diced tomatoes, drained for thicker salsa

½ bunch of cilantro

1or 2 fresh jalapenos

¼ onion (red, white or yellow)

1 tsp. ground cumin

1 tsp. garlic powder or two cloves fresh

Juice of ½ to 1 lime

Salt - to taste

Place all of the above ingredients in a food processor or blender and blend until smooth. Serve as an appetizer with chips and guacamole and also with dinner.

NOTE: Skip the food processor and coarse chop ingredients and use fresh tomatoes instead of canned for a fresh and fabulous pico de gallo.

Enjoy, Clever Tribe- I know I will. x

A Top Shelf Goal- Not Margarita

OK, Clever Girls- it’s time to talk hockey again. What good are the rules if you don’t know the terminology? I will soften the blow here by adding a recipe at the bottom and pique your interest with some HOT HOT photos of the Dallas Stars.

Assist- the person who handles the puck prior to the person who actually scores the goal is credited with an assist. Only two people can be credited with assists per goal. Also, a credit given to the friend who helps you acquire a date with a totally hot dude who loves hockey.

Backchecking- when the players rush back to the defending zone when the opposing team is on the attack. This is similar to the last look you give in the mirror to make certain your skirt is not hung up on your panties or you don't have toilet paper hanging from your shoe.

Backhand shot- a shot taken using the back side of the blade of the hockey stick. This is much more exciting than that "compliment" from your mother-in-law.

Blind pass- a pass made from one player to another without looking. Hockey is so intuitive and the best players operate on instinct a great deal of the time. This is evidence of the faith they have their teammates are in position. Not to be confused with the "hail mary" at 1:58 a.m. just before the last guests are kicked out of the bar.

Boarding- hitting a player from behind and shoving them into the boards (walls surrounding the ice). This can go horribly wrong as it did with a cheap boarding incident on Kris Draper of the Red Wings by then Avalanche player Claude Lemeiux. Kris’ face was literally crushed. Different from getting on the plane.

Body checking- using the body to take a player to the ice or into the boards. We all do it- admit it! From a distance, up close- it is impossible not to do the once-over.

Breakaway- one of the most exciting plays in all of hockey and the perfect opportunity for players to showcase their skill. The player with possession of the puck has no defenders between he and the goal- other than the goalie, of course. You will see speed, agility, grace and calculation between the player and the goalie. Also a term that can be used to describe your release from a dismal interaction with the dude you have been trying to avoid all night. Cut it short next time by calling your gynecologist for "results." Hell, just the word gynecologist is enough to have guys squirming.

Check or checking- two methods by which to interrupt the play. With the body or the stick- it is legal to make contact with the play in possession of the puck or the player last to have possession. Yes, this is another name for the bill- which you should not be disinclined to pay occasionally.

Clearing the puck- a defenders method of getting the puck out of their own defending zone and into their attacking zone.

Crease- the blue ice in front of each net. Just get some Botox- everyone is doing it.

Cross bar- the horizontal bar at the top of the net. I know it sounds like football- but it is hockey.

Delayed offsides- when a player enters their attacking zone ahead of the puck without touching it. The call is delayed to see who touches the puck first.

Delayed penalty- if the team not in possession of the puck earns a penalty, the ref will raise his arm to indicate one will be called but does not stop the play until or if the offending team touches the puck.

Drop pass- another fascinating play. The player in possession of the puck literally drops it and another player picks it up.

Empty net goal or empty net- within the final two minutes of a game, the goaltender of the team that is behind might be pulled to allow an extra forward on the ice, thereby increasing the chance of scoring and tying the game. If the opposing team puts the puck in the empty net, it is an empty net goal. Not empty NEST- empty NET.

Five hole- the gap between a goaltender’s legs. I don't think there is a Clever way to turn this phrase.

Goal line- the line in front of the goal the puck must cross completely to be considered a goal.

Hand pass- just like it sounds- this is legal in one’s defensive zone but not in the neutral zone or attacking zone. Not advisable, unless you are on your third date.

Hat trick- three goals in one game. Different from a Gordie Howe Hat trick- one goal, one assist and one fight in one game. Count on Brenden Morrow to be a leader with this honor. This is not when you "jokingly" grab a guys hat from his head only to reveal his male-pattern baldness.

Odd man rush- when the offense enters the attacking zone and outnumbers the defenders in the zone. You seem him coming from a mile away- take yourself out of his path- quickly.

Screened shot- a shot the goalie cannot see due to it being obscured by other players.

Slapshot- other than the famous movie- this is a hard shot with a big set up. You do not want to be in front of it. The one you WANT to give your mother-in-law.

Top shelf- a goal that enters the top portion of the net. Yes, it is also a margarita.

Zamboni- is the huge thing that looks like a truck that prepares the ice for play. Not called a Lebowski.

OK, I have left out any terminology relating to penalties because it is a section all its own. We can put that off for a while because we have plenty of time left in the season. One question- what is up with my RED WINGS? ARRRRG. It should be stated that this is not a comprehensive list of terminology, as I have to leave you with some questions to ask- during commercials or breaks. Guys love to impart knowledge, so ask questions even if you know the answer. Imagine his surprise when you notice a feisty winger has already scored a goal and an assist and you say- "As soon as he whips someone's ass, he will have a Gordie Howe hat trick!"

Anyone hungry? I was craving a Northern classic- stuffed peppers- yum. I thought I would share this recipe- though there are a few twists.

What you need for stuffed peppers

Brown rice

2 large cans of crushed tomatoes, tomato sauce or diced tomatoes. If you can, get the ones that have Italian spices already added- it only helps to enhance the spices you add.

4 large red, yellow, orange or green peppers

Garlic powder

Dried oregano

2 lbs. ground beef- or for a twist on this recipe- ground lamb

Freshly grated parmesan (if you select the ground lamb route- purchase some feta crumbles)

Elective ingredients are- ½ a red onion, finely chopped; four cloves fresh garlic, minced; and 10 leaves of fresh basil, chopped.

OK- it's time to get your hands dirty.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Prepare two cups of brown rice

Place the ground beef in a large mixing bowl- add a generous amount of dried oregano and garlic powder, and a fair amount of salt. Add the cooked brown rice to the bowl and mix well. If you choose to use the elective ingredients- add them now.

Slice off just the top of the peppers- remove the core and clean. Slice off the bottom so as not going quite through the pepper but enough to create an almost flat bottom. Place the peppers upright in a casserole dish.

Place the tomato sauce in a pan. Add a generous amount of oregano, garlic powder and salt. Heat.

Once the sauce is warmed through- put a large spoonful into the bottom of each pepper- fill the peppers the rest of the way with the ground beef mixture. Leave room on the top for another spoon of tomato sauce- sprinkle with parmesan cheese. If you have gone the lamb route- top with feta crumbles instead of parmesan.

Pour a generous amount of the tomato sauce into the bottom of the casserole dish. Put peppers into the oven and bake at 350 for 45 minutes.

Championship Cooking for Tonight

Ok, Clever Girls- are you ready to cook? Huge game tonight! This is it. University of Texas takes on Alabama. Now, as you know, I am a huge fan of the Longhorns and not a fan of Nick Saban- so there is no ambiguity with regard to what side I am on. We can talk football soon, but right now, you are going to need to get started on dinner.

Meatball Subs

Two large cans of tomato sauce into a large stock pot

Add a generous amount of dried oregano

Add a generous amount of garlic powder

Medium heat

In a large bowl combine 2 lbs. of ground beef

1 cup of Italian bread crumbs

½ cup of egg substitute or 2 large eggs

½ red onion chopped small

5 large leaves of fresh basil chopped

3 cloves of garlic minced

Mix with hands (use gloves if this is a repellant concept), then begin making small meatballs and add them to the sauce. Cook on medium-low until you are ready to eat.

When you are ready to serve- cut your bread down the middle from the side to open it up flat. Broil it until it is lightly browned- take the inside out of the bread to make room for the meatballs.

Fill the larger hollowed out side of the bread with mozzarella cheese and then meatballs. Cover with sauce and close. Cut in half and serve. Yum.

OK- I need to shop with my very Clever Cousin and get him outfitted for the New Year. I will post again before game time and tell you why I think the Longhorns are going to pull this off.

Resolve to Be Resolute

Clever Tribe, an official Happy New Year to you all. Thank you for joining me for a really fantastic one. I have had many e-mails asking for my thoughts on resolutions and what the NEW year holds for me personally.

In my opinion- resolutions have become diluted- a “wish list,” if you will. If there is no chance of achieving the goal- it should not go on your list of resolutions. To be resolute is steadfastly determined- unwavering. It is my firm belief the only things that should be articulated as New Year’s resolutions are those that you truly want to accomplish. Don’t say it for your wife- “I’m going to work less, be home more.” “I’m going to lose 20 pounds.” Resolutions need to be for you, by you.

The number one resolution is to ... (rivaled only by quitting smoking)

... lose weight. What are you WEIGHTING for? I have a saying- it’s easier to stay in shape than get in shape. So, in approaching this New Year’s resolution, I am going to give you some advice as to how to transition this from your yearly resolution to knocking it off your list permanently.

... spend more time with the family. If you have to put that on your resolution list- you probably don’t really want to do it. My advice is to re-evaluate your priorities as a whole and find out what really is important to you- where your family falls on that list- and see if you can’t identify why.

... pay off debt. That’s a big one. Because I vowed never again to say “in these economic times,” I will instead say in this economy a great number of people will be lucky to survive with their small business intact, their job, their home, their children still enjoying extra activities, keeping up with paying minimums on the maxed-out credit cards … For those struggling, keep your head down and ride this out. While it might be the worst economic condition the country has seen in decades, it will rebound. It would help if the media would lend a hand and zip it with the doom and gloom.

... secure that promotion. What has stopped you before? Why is it so important right now and what are you going to do differently that will poise you for advancement? If you’d been doing so all along- perhaps you’d have already been promoted.

The point to all this is do not make resolutions for anyone else. For that matter, why share them at all? You are so busy DOING- you have not time to ponder, discuss or be challenged. Further- knock them off this year. I cannot tell you how many people I know who articulate the same resolutions every year.

Resolve to resolve this year. Whether it’s a conflicted relationship. Whether you are unhappy at work. Whether you need to clean up your diet or quit smoking. Now is the time to DO IT. Part of being CLEVER is having purpose- making an effort. Let’s be So Very Clever this year.

For my resolution- I resolve to be resolute. Each and everything I endeavor this year I will confront head on with every intention of vanquishing, accomplishing or completing.

Now- here are some tips for those of you heading off to the gym today for the first time in a very long time. What you put in your mouth amounts to more than 50 percent of how you look. So, you can beat yourself up at the gym and then ruin all your efforts by eating improperly. Not to say you shouldn’t go to the gym, because any exercise is better than no exercise.

Cut out soda and substitute it with water (add lemon or some cucumber slices if you find water boring) or unsweetened green tea (some experts assert green tea is better for you than water).

Cut down on the fat in your diet- if it isn’t natural fat, do not consume it. Eat leaner meats- pork tenderloin, turkey, chicken and lean beef (filet and 90% fat-free ground beef).

Use a heart-healthy oil such as Enova instead of so much butter or olive or even cooking oil.

Use reduced-fat dairy products whenever possible.

Avoid refined sugar and corn syrup. I know you won’t believe me, but corn syrup is in virtually everything in a package, jar or container. Surprise yourself by reading labels on foods before you buy them. Avoid it when at all possible and you will see your body change.

If you want to sweeten coffee or tea- use raw sugar. I am not an advocate of artificial sweeteners, though I have been known to use some Splenda. When I decided to eliminate refined sugar- I just began to drink my coffee with a little milk, soy milk or black. Iced tea is just fine without or with lemon.

Here is a big one- it might be the toughest one yet- avoid WHITE foods. These generally are processed, refined and enriched. I won’t go into the specifics- but suffice it to say- your body doesn’t like this. Imagine your body a machine (which it is) and it runs best and most efficiently if you put in only the purest, cleanest fuel. So, why aren’t you? Why would you put processed food in your body in great amounts? Don’t get me wrong- everything in moderation, but if there are options- why wouldn’t you use them?

What are the options to WHITE?

Whole-grain foods- now, this is a buzz word, so you need to be diligent in reading packages. If it still says- bleached or enriched wheat flour- avoid it. There are breads, pastas, crackers and tortillas out there made with unbleached, unenriched wheat flour. The more whole grains you are putting in your body- the more fiber you're ingesting, the quicker your food is processed in your body and turned into fuel, and then, finally, the quicker it is moved through. The last thing you want is to have waste lingering in your body.

Here are some brands you should look for

Kashi- amazing and pure cereals, crackers, snack bars

Central Market and Whole Foods have whole-wheat tortillas (I prefer Central Market because they make them fresh daily- I buy 10 packages and freeze them)

Enova oil- use it for Good Seasons Italian dressing or homemade dressings (remember- the less processed foods, like store-bought dressing, the better)

Food Should Taste Good- fantastic whole-grain crackers and chips

I know there are those who say the sugar in fruit is bad for you- but if the option is a candy bar- I do not agree. If you must have something sweet through the day- Kashi has great bars, and green apples and grapes travel well. I personally am a huge fan of fruit and don't limit it in my diet- especially blackberries and raspberries. Mmmm- just taste the antioxidants.

It would be impossible for me to overestimate the importance of vegetables in your diet. I know- eewwweee. It doesn't have to be the case. Who doesn't love cucumbers? Try cutting up a platter of orange, green or red peppers, some cucumbers and green apples an hour and a half before dinner to snack on. Carrots are high in sugar, but it's natural sugar so go for it. Celery is another great snack. Try to avoid dips and dressings- but if you must- try reduced-fat ranch or the Cottage Cheese Dip I posted a while back (made with low- or non-fat dairy products, it is a great source of protein and flavor).

Baking potatoes are white- try to substitute them with baked butternut squash or sweet potatoes. Many grocers now carry sweet potato fries you can bake- add a little salt and YUM.

Asking the advice of someone at Whole Foods or in the organic section of your local store is a good first start. Tell them you are looking to cut out corn syrup and refined sugar, bleached flour etc. They will put you on the right path.

It is difficult to change your old habits, but before long, you will find the food tastes better in it’s natural form. Don’t misunderstand me- I am the first person to take down a pan of rice crispy treats made by my friend, Jennifer, or to demolish a plate of Mexican food- but I eat corn tortillas instead of white flour and try not to do it every day.

Eating out is not as difficult as you might think- but it’s definitely easier to cook healthy at home. Anytime you can order whole wheat on a sandwich, eliminate the oil from fajitas or ask for no butter or oil in your food, hold the cheese and mayo (add pickles and peppers)- you are doing your body a favor.

As your body begins to run more smoothly and you start losing a little weight, your work-outs will be more productive. When you see results, you will be more motivated.

I know this is asking too much- but, if you can add hot yoga three times a week- you are reallllllly healing your body from the inside, strengthening your core and detoxifying your body. Oh, and you burn a TON of calories!

I’ll add more tips for healthy eating in the coming weeks- we can do it together. I’ve put on my winter weight and it is almost time to hit the pool. Yikes!

Resolve to resolve. Resolve to be resolute.

New Year's Yummmm

Ok, Clever Tribe- one of the most Clever Guys I know, Geoff (nickname also CG, stands for Cool Geoff- not self-proclaimed but earned in college for being, well, cool)- seems to have a problem with my breakfast taco recipe from yesterday and I am anticipating his grievance- use chorizo instead of sausage. I have a good reason for not doing so- I abhor chorizo. If you like it- use it. This is a matter of being Clever. If you like chorizo- and you are making something with the word "taco" in it- substitute chorizo for sausage. Fair enough, CG? Or are you going to give me a hard time for suggesting store-bought salsa? OK- for game day and New Year's Day- here is a quick and easy homemade salsa recipe pirated from El Azteco in East Lansing, Mich. I must tell you- even though I paid $50 for this recipe- it doesn't taste the same. Either way- my bastardized version is below-

El Az Salsa

Large can of diced tomatoes (drained for thicker salsa)

Two large jalapenos- rinsed and cut in half

1/2 white onion-coarsely chopped

1 bunch of cilantro- rinsed

sea salt

cumin

garlic powder

black pepper

In a food processor- puree the tomatoes. Add a liberal amount of salt, a dash of garlic powder, black pepper and a more liberal amount of cumin.

Set mixture aside in a large bowl.

Add a small handful of cilantro, both jalapenos and the onion to food processor and process until it is almost like a roux- thick but not liquidy.

Combine- enjoy with chips.

I suppose CG (Geoff) would propose you cut homemade corn tortillas in quarters and fry them yourself. I prefer to get a bag of baked chips from Whole Foods.

Is it time to discuss Mike Leach? No. There is nothing to say- abuse of power? Likely. Tech's way of getting out of a nearly $1 million bonus? Likely. Did he put the wrong kid in an equipment shed? For certain. Why don't you just slap Dan Patrick's daughter across the face? Have mouth- have platform- will use it- someone is going to get hurt. Hmmm.

Also received an e-mail yesterday from a reader asking for an alternative to serving chili to her guests tomorrow. She is from Michigan and it's freaking cold- so, I am going to give you my favorite recipe for goulash. We Northerners are big on things served in a bowl- steaming hot with warm bread. Yum.

Goulash for Game Day

Two large cans of diced tomatoes- if you can find the ones that have the Italian spices added already- get them. Make sure you don't inadvertently get the ones with green chilies or you will have an interesting Southwesty goulash.

I use 1 lb. of 90/10 ground beef- but for those who prefer meaty, hearty, meaty, meaty- use more. If you prefer tomatoey to meaty- add another can of tomatoes.

1 large white onion

salt

olive oil

garlic powder

oregano

3/4 can of water

Elbow macaroni- or whole wheat fusilli (my fave)

Open tomatoes and put them in a large soup pot on medium heat. Add water. Add a generous amount to sea salt, garlic powder and oregano.

Coarsely chop the onion and saute in a splash of olive oil. Once they are well cooked- transparent but not burned- add to the tomato mixture.

Brown ground beef and drain- add to tomato mixture. Simmer for a couple hours- stir and make sure it's covered so you do not lose your liquid.

Taste- it should be evident there is salt in there- if it is not- add some- it really heightens the flavors.

Prepare pasta in water and serve goulash over the pasta. Not as much as you would use for pasta- there should be more goulash than pasta.

Warm a loaf of French or Italian bread and yum. Serves a lot of people and isn't CHILI.

OK- I must go- have family descending.

Have a safe and wonderful evening- let's put this b*&^h of a year to bed. No looking back. I'll shout at you tomorrow with some thoughts I have on resolutions for the NEW year.

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Be Married Like You are Dating

I had a friend tell me the other day- “If I could do it all over again, I wouldn’t have married someone stupid.” I gave over to paroxysms of laughter until I realized he was totally serious. I apologized- said it sounded a little- harsh. He went on to tell me the decision to marry came at an age when he didn’t realize the role of intellectual compatibility would be so critical. They were young, having fun, she was pretty, she wanted children, came from a nice family- all of the ingredients were in place. Until he realized what ingredients he needed to sustain a lifelong marriage.

As it turned out- and this is just his opinion- she isn’t fun anymore (she's a mom- never wants to do anything without the kids), she resents how much he works (though she covets their lifestyle), hates the fact she raised three kids alone (she didn’t really support his efforts building the lifestyle to which she has become addicted and has never worked a single day in her life), they don’t know each other, have no shared experiences in life other than their family. He has been in the workplace for three decades and she has been at home. They grew apart 20 years ago and have been married “for the kids.”

Exposing the children to an emotionally barren marriage is more damaging than divorce. Children have to see love. They have to witness affection- it’s not enough to dote on them separately. They need to view the marriage as the solid foundation of a family- so they can build one themselves someday. It is my theory (while not advocating marriage or divorce) that children thrive in a loving home- whether that's the home of Dad and his third wife who adores his children and they spend every single moment together as a unit or whether it's a biological family. You need love. You need to give it, receive it and share it- openly and freely.

As a result of our conversation, I woke up thinking about Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. They have refused to give in to societal expectations they should wed. I recall an article featuring Kurt I read more than a decade ago in which he talked about the beauty of a completely elective relationship. They are together because they WANT to be. Not because they are bound by law- not because they VOWED to be, not because their family members and friends have placed an expectation on them- but because they wake each day and CHOOSE to be together.

Now, it is my theory they re-evaluate the relationship often. Perhaps they didn’t grow apart because they continuously invest in one another and the relationship. Marriage can cause you to take one another for granted. So- when I woke this morning- I saw Goldie’s gorgeous smile radiating at Kurt and knew in my heart if they were bound by law- that smile might have faded over the years. The relationship might have become a product of habit instead of what they both likely consider a privilege.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if love was enough? Being in love could be enough of a commitment? Serving one another because you love them? Loving wholly and honestly because you WANT to? Having to earn that person’s love daily by being kind, compassionate, interested, engaged, authentic, willing, desirable, staying healthy, looking your best, staying in shape, providing for one another?

What if we actually cast off the “obligation” of marriage and had to worry the other person might find someone more attractive or interesting or a better fit? Would we try harder? Would be take more care? Would we devote more time? We would. Especially if we desired the relationship. Fights would not be so volatile- because we’d have to worry the other person might not come back when they stormed out of the house. We might actually be gentler, less condescending and cruel. If we knew our harsh treatment might result in loss- immediate and final- my gosh, imagine how the landscape would change …

Goldie and Kurt keep doing this every single day and have for decades. So, I was thinking, as we head into a new year, what about rearticulating marriage. Live it like you were dating in the respect you are married because you want to be. Serve the person you are with. Make them feel loved daily. Prove your affection- and earn theirs. Think about the aspects of the marriage where you feel you have failed and look deep inside for ways to restore, repair and renew. If you are feeling your marriage is dying- give it one last chance.

You have taken your wife for granted- woken up each day, rolled out of bed, showered and left for work without so much as an acknowledgment. “She doesn’t like to chat in the morning.” How about instead you slip out of bed and make some coffee- bring her a robe and ask her to talk to you while you shower so you can find out what her day is like- maybe you can meet for lunch.

Maybe you have forgotten to tell your husband how much you appreciate the fact you have not had to work for 10 years and been able to stay home with the kids until they all were in school. You’ve treated him with resentment for being “gone” so much and not as involved as you’d like. He has been simmering with resentment as well because you alternately castigate him for working too much and wanting more for your children and yourself. Maybe get a sitter, send him a sexy text asking him to meet you for drinks. Discuss your plans for the coming year- maybe you’d like to go back to work or are thinking of starting a business and would like his opinion.

Have you let yourself fall completely out of shape? This isn’t fair to anyone. Being unhealthy could lead to premature death- what better way to say- “I don’t care if I live or die.” Hit the gym, invest in your appearance- your spouse deserves it. Let the other person know you want them to find you desirable and not just for who you are (because of course you are endlessly Clever and appealing). Maintaining our fitness is an obligation to ourselves and our spouses. I am not saying it’s easy to get back in shape after children or to get in shape ever- but it can and should be done. Being lazy and out of shape is a message to your spouse and it says this- “You are stuck with me- we are married and you are bound by law to love me and not cheat on me just because you want to have sex with someone who is hot.” Hmmm. Taking a lot for granted.

Have you let your children come between you? Hiding behind them to avoid dealing with problems lurking in your marriage? Did you realize after you were married you have entirely different parenting philosophies and it has become a raging battle in your home nearly destroying your marriage and family with it? Sit down with your spouse and determine if the marriage is important enough to come to terms with your parenting opposition.

We are different when we are dating. Try dating your spouse for a while. See what happens.

OK, Clever Tribe- the first game starts at 10 a.m. I believe, and a hangover is almost a certainty, so I want to make it easy on you by suggesting you prepare things in advance- food which will be nourishing while nursing that queasy stomach and aching head.

Breakfast Tacos

1 lb. ground beef (I use 90/10)

This is optional- one entire package of hot Italian sausage- Jimmy Dean or the like is fine

Simply Potatoes hash browns (they have a few varieties and shapes of breakfast potatoes so pick the one you prefer- another option is to use canned, diced, new potatoes- but these are not as fresh)

Eggs to taste- I say this because I prefer fake eggs and less egg than meat

Your favorite salsa

Your favorite tortillas (I prefer whole wheat made at Centeral Market- yum)

Salt

Pepper

Garlic powder

Ground cumin

Sour cream

Mixed, grated cheese

Sliced jalapenos

I use Pam in the bottom of a large saute pan (but cooking oil can be used for a crispy hash brown). Brown the hash browns, add the beef and or sausage or both.

Some people prefer crispy hash browns- if this is the case, brown your hash browns to crispy and then set them aside to mix in at the last moment.

Brown the meat- to it add salt, pepper and garlic- and a fair amount of cumin. I go heavy on the salt and the cumin- but all seasonings should be to taste.

Add the eggs and mix until the eggs are thoroughly cooked.

Warm the tortillas and place in a tortilla warmer or on a towel in between two plates. Put the meat, egg and potato mixture in a large bowl.

The salsa, sour cream, cheese and jalapenos are accompaniments. YUMMM. This is the perfect brunch meal for game day.

Make the taco pie from previous posts- Texas caviar and the cottage cheese dip and you have yourself a PARTY. Don’t forget the mimosas from yesterday’s post and BEER. Lots and lots of BEER. Yum.

I'll get back to it on Saturday to offer post game commentary and future match up commentary- most likely will consult Erin Hogan from ESPN Austin as he is my GO TO sports guy. Check the out of facebook- The Horn. The guys at The Horn are So Very Clever. Chip, Sean, Geoff, Chad, Erin, Dan ...

Such a Tool

There is no doubt a woman’s mind is her sharpest tool. And, so there is no confusion- when I use the word "tool" I'm not talking about your ex-boyfriend or the dude in the next cubicle at work. The average man has amassed a virtual stockade of tools, many of which not even he knows the use for. While it's unnecessary for you to know how to use an auto-feed screw gun or an electric boring machine, you should know the basic hand tools by sight, own them and have a working knowledge of their uses. No, it does not mean you have to use them- ideally, the man in your space will say, “Oh, I could handle that if I had a wrench.” This will give you a great opportunity to say, “How weird, I just picked up a new household tool kit, don’t worry about it, I can do it later.” No self-respecting man is going to allow that, so not only will he do it for you, he will be vastly impressed by your tool kit- even if it is the wildly cool Apollo set in pink. This set screams girlie gir,l so be prepared for what you are advertising.

Now obviously the most important tool in the house is a wine opener, but because you already own one- or several- and know how to work it, I needn’t waste any time discussing it.

For the record, while a hammer is good for many things, opening wine when you are unable to locate the opener is not one of them.

The reason I am beginning our tool lesson with the hammer is because it was the first tool created. The earliest version of it was a stone cradled by fingers, which were so frequently smashed, necessity dictated innovation.

This is your garden-variety claw hammer. The face is what you will use to drive an object- usually a nail. While there are many different types of hammers, the claw hammer will manage most of the needs you confront in the home. If you elect not to purchase a household tool kit, but instead intend to select your tools individually, it is essential to find a well-constructed hammer that feels good in your hand. While it is common to acquire tools from family members, make certain you never use a hammer with a cracked or splitting handle- this could lead to injury more significant than a broken nail (the one on your hand, not the one you are trying to drive).

Common uses for a hammer are to hang pictures; the claw is designed to remove nails. Despite the myth created by Hollywood, the hammer is not an ideal weapon, primarly due to the proximity in which you would need to be to execute a fatal blow.

Pliers (not to be confused with men who ply women with alcohol in hopes of impairing their judgment in their favor) are used for gripping. A set of handles with jaws on the opposing end. There is a single pivot point that allows for the opening and closing of the jaws, using the handles. Same principle as scissors, but instead of cutting you are gripping, holding or removing. While there are myriad types of pliers, most varieties fall into one of two categories: slip-jointed (where the pivot area is adjustable so as to expand to fit the item being gripped or held) or solid-jointed (where the jaws expand to one size). As with an adjustable wrench, you can count on the solid-jointed pliers to be more stable and allow for better gripping power than the slip-jointed,

Also noteworthy are needle-nose pliers, which are generally a fixture in any household tool kit. These are less bulky and come to a point at the end, unlike common pliers, which are rounded and thick.

I will continue the tool section next week with the wrench and the screwdriver. You know, the drink with orange juice and vodka? Speaking of which, here is my favorite mimosa recipe to start off New Year's Day.

MIMOSA

As with most recipes, the key to flavor is the quality of the ingredients you use. I prefer to use freshly squeezed juices for my mimosas, but if you have neither the time nor the inclination you can use whatever your favorite store-bought brand might be. Oh, and don't get me wrong, I don't actually buy oranges and grapefruit and squeeze them- I buy it at Whole Foods or Central Market- YUM.


You will need:

Fresh-Squeezed Orange or Grapefruit Juice (Be very cautious making the mimosa with grapefruit, as it reacts with the Champagne. It will overflow- so mix slowly)

Champagne or Sparkling Wine: I like Mumm Napa Brut Sparkling Wine, as it's neither too sweet or cloying


Now- begin by filling the flute or wine glass with the sparkling wine. I like my mimosa very pale- more sparkling wine than juice- so I do a three-quarter glass of sparkling wine and one-quarter juice.
I know people who like a half glass of sparkling wine, a quarter juice and a splash of vodka. It's not for me, but for some.


It would seem appropriate tomorrow's post deal in some way with putting 2009 to bed and welcoming 2010 with clean sheets, ready and willing to embrace the wonders of the new year. I will include some recipes tomorrow for the big New Year's Day celebrations.


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