Red River Shoot-out 2010

Because I am the luckiest Clever Girl on Earth- I’m currently having an ice cold Bud Light and fresh lime with my go-to sports guy- Erin Hogan of ESPN Austin. I can’t imagine anything as enthralling as the all-football-almost-all-0f-the-time talk we are going to have for days on end. He and the rest of the guys- Sean Adams, Geoff Ketchum, Chip Brown and Chad Hastings- will be at Dick’s Last Resort in Victory Park from 1-7 p.m. Friday and Dick's will be gameday broadcast headquarters Saturday. Come out and get a load of them. Again, So Very Handsome group of guys- any Clever Girl can find something to gaze upon.

However, do not show up if you have not done some research. So, this is a three-part post and I expect you to put some time into your approach to gameday- and I do mean beyond figuring out what jeans you are going to wear (incidentally, the ones that look best should be on the top of your list).

Top Five Reasons a So Very Clever Guy’s Girl Should Read Bleacher Report

5. Because you're lazy if you don’t.

4. Oprah is retiring and what the freaking hell else are you going to do during that 40 minutes (in fast forward through commercials) you carved out daily?

3. They do the work for you- by researching all available media portals to provide the discerning sports talk junkie with the most up to the minute info a Guy’s Girl could ask for.

2. You will likely not survive for one minute in a group of sports minded dudes without at least reading the top two stories delivered to your e-mail (could not be any easier for you) prior to game day. Unless of course you have Erin Hogan as your front man- as I DO.

1. I was going to punk out with "It Rules," but Erin insisted we relax a bit and be more Clever. Because it requires so little investment of time to showcase your prowess- why would you not do it? Don’t forget, if you are stumped- say "Wow, I’d never thought of that," or "What do YOU think?" or "You are so Clever." Works every time.

What is higher than one? Like higher than the 4.0 grade point average? Your man will consider your knowledge on par with a nooner. This is the type of thing that happens when E and I share a few beers. So Very Clever commentary – for YOU.

Top Five Reasons Texas is Going to Lose the Red River Shoot-out

5. Better more experienced quarterback generally wins. V to OU.

4. The Longhorn’s best receivers are a freshman and a sophomore- the freshman is hurt. The rest can’t catch a cold or run junior high passing routes. Perhaps they would do well on Appalachian State or, hell, on University of Michigan the last two years.

3. The Texas offense has mastered grab-ass- but that is not as effective as taking anyone to the turf or, hell, even blocking them.

2. This team is on par with football turf when it comes to rating their football IQ- it seems team play is not as intuitive as it should be for one of the best recruited teams in the nation.

1. Unless there’s been a personnel change- Greg Davis will still be calling the shots.

Now- just so Julie doesn’t quit speaking to me after almost two decades of friendship- I am going to have to challenge all of this with …

Top Five Reason Texas is Going to Win the Red River Shoot-out

5. I look better in Burnt Orange than Crimson. Aside from that, I’m pressing E Hogan to be So Very Clever- The Sooners once vaunted D has given up an average of 28 points to the likes of Utah State, Air Force and Cincinnati (are you listening Greg Davis?)

4. The Okies O-line (offensive line) has also attended the grab-ass academy of holding and are drawing some significant penalties. Muschamp's (UT defensive coordinator) front seven (defensive line) will abuse them.

3. Under pressure, Landry Jones (Clever Girls- this is the OU man at the helm- and by helm I mean QB) makes coffee nervous and becomes color blind. Honestly- there is no end to E Hogan’s Cleverness.

2. The Sooners have their Greg Davis equal in Brent Venebles who has a similar approval ratings in Oklahoma as our Commander in Chief.

1. Bob Stoops, once known as "Big Game Bob Stoops" is now "Big Flop Bob" outside Norman. Since being humiliated in the 2004 National Championship game by USC (now, regardless of whether the NCAA strips USC of that title- they still got spanked- and it wasn’t the good kind of ass-slapping) the Sooners are a .500 football team- away from the friendly confines of Norman, Joklahoma. This includes four of five straight drops to Texas.

I’m now relatively sure the amount of s*&^ I'm going to take from Julie is just about what I can stand. I'm going to put up HORNS proudly- I can take a loss as well as the next girl. Hell, I'm a UM fan and I'm from Detroit. It's the hard-knock life for us.

Side note- University of Michigan- D-Rob is clear for play (Denard Robinson) which should make for some riveting play action on Saturday in Bloomington, Ind. I CAN NOT wait. I know, right know, RichRod is counting his freaking blessings for the fact that D-Rob is going to save his head from the guillotine. I was the one in the hood, BTW- I guess I’ll have to WAIT until Jim Harbaugh dares to return to UM.

Have You Seen the Budget Line for Photography YET?

OK, Clever Tribe- it’s time to start putting our heads together and sell some books. As you know, my first novel, "Consumed," is available for presale on bn.com. It can be purchased now but will be shipped mid-December.

I want to reward those of you who are loyal readers of Clever, and/or your family members and friends. So, I am going to run a contest.

This is how it will work: If you or anyone you know is getting married in December of 2010 or in any month in 2011- this is something you want to get involved in.

The RULES-

1. You have to become a fan of Clever Girl on Facebook. I'll cross check your name with your e-mail.
2. You have to e-mail me at soveryclevergrl@gmail.com and tell me the bride and groom’s names, and the date and location of the wedding. After this, I will return the e-mail and give you a contest code. This number will allow me to keep track of all your entries.
3. Refer all your friends and relatives (hell, everyone on your invite list, co-workers etc. …) to http://www.soveryclever.com-/ where they will read and comment daily between now and the 31st of October. They will begin each comment with your order code.
4. You (bride or groom) and all of your referrals must then purchase "Consumed" athttp://www.bn.com/ and e-mail your receipt to soveryclevergrl@gmail.com- use your contest code in the subject line. When your friends, family members and co-workers order "Consumed" from http://www.bn.com-/ they have to forward the receipt tosoveryclevergrl@gmail.com with your contest code in the subject line (this will be your proof of purchase to be added to the bride's total count).
5. So, to recap. In order to qualify for the contest you must become a fan of Clever Girl on FB (encourage all your friends and family members to do the same)- e-mail me atsoveryclevergrl@gmail.com and introduce yourself- give me all the details pertinent to your wedding (or your sister’s wedding or you mother’s wedding- whom ever you are supporting). Every day, all of your people need to log ontohttp://www.soveryclever.com/, read the blog and leave comments. All comments have to begin with your contest code so I can add it to your profile. Each person who buys "Consumed" between now and the 31st of October will give you another chance to win. All receipts from http://www.bn.com/ need to be e-mailed to soveryclevergrl@gmail.comwith your contest code in the subject line.

WHAT DO YOU WIN?

In case you didn’t know, I am a professional photographer as well. I have been shooting weddings all over the world for 13 years and simply LOVE it. You can preview my wedding website at www.lidestriphoto.com. At the end of October, I will be offering the person who has followed the rules and referred the most people to Clever Girl and whose "team" has purchased the most copies of "Consumed" wedding photography any where in the country free of charge. Now, this is a $7,000 value. It will include me photographing your wedding for seven hours (continuous time) and giving you a disc of all the images. You will own them and therefore be able to do with them as you wish. I will handle all my own travel expenses.

As an added bonus- anyone in Dallas who refers one hundred people (each referral must also buy "Consumed") will be eligible for an engagement or family sitting (all images on disc). Within one hour from Dallas proper.

So, tell all of your friends who are getting married!! I’m really excited to do this- and thank you so much for your continued support.

Happy Anniversary, So Very Clever!

Clever Tribe- I can not believe it’s been a year already! Thank you So Very Much to all my readers who have been with me since day one and all the new readers. There is so much going on on my end- I’m winding up the editing process on my first novel, "Consumed"- it’s been an a amazingly long process- beginning when I wrote it almost seven years ago. Check this out for details.

I added our first author podcast- a small question and answer portion. This first installment is me interviewing Alisa- we are answering questions from our readers via video. Should be fun. Click here to watch.

This is a defining year- I said I’d be published by 40 and I will have a book published one month before my 41st celebration. Whew. I don’t like when my predictions (especially in football) do not come to fruition.

I’m working hard on Book Two. The research is a bitch- no kidding- and I have a feeling it’s about to become a bit painful. You will understand all of that when you read it.

I want to express my gratitude to you all- this blog has been a gift to me. The most difficult thing for any writer is to write daily and you’ve keep me so inspired this year I have been able to do just that. Your comments and lines of communication have opened up the So Very Clever concept.

At the onset- the blog was simply a place to test drive the content for a book (still upcoming) called "The So Very Clever Girl’s Guide to Being a Guy’s Girl." Immediately, however, the content started evolving and you were asking my opinion on fashion and parenting and wedding planning. I have so enjoyed expanding and the creation of the content has stretched me as a writer. What more could you ask from a symbiotic relationship?

I’ve had women accuse me of marriage bashing. That is not my intent and if you feel offended by my marriage posts- you might want to examine WHY you are offended. Could be you are perpetrating some of the frauds I cite. Just a guess. I find offense usually comes from two places- the other person is on the mark or so far from it there is not reason to be offended.

I plan to explore the male realm vividly in the next six months- there is so much left to experience- I can’t wait. Love all things male- even trimmings in the bathroom sink and socks on the floor. How can you deny things so quintessentially MALE?

There is a bit of a nip in the air and that just gets me all hyped up about football. I promise, Clever Girls- the content in the sports posts will save your ass- especially on game weekends. Don’t just be a wallflower- read up and get in there. Start TALKING.

There is a new platform coming your way as soon as I catch up with social media paragon Jeremi Karnell for some tutorials. He really is the best at what he does, just a bit elusive as of late. I am promising a community where we can all get to know one another better. It’s time to get this thing monetized as well- writing is an addiction and it needs funding.

OK- over and out. Expect UT/OU talk in the next few days, I am lucky enough to be able to spend a couple days with the So Very Clever Crew from ESPN Austin. These guys know the score, so weigh in with them at Dick’s Last Resort on Friday morning!

Thank God for Those Who Dodged Bullets Today

In light of the shooting scare at University of Texas this morning, I have a few things I need to say. I dropped a child I absolutely cherish off in front of Jester (21^st & Speedway) on Sunday and as I looked at the tower wistfully I said out loud- "Let’s hope that doesn’t happen again." Merely two days later, I am staring at her dorm on TV- the shooter’s dead body is in the library across the street.

At this point- some confusion exists as to whether there is another shooter than the one who has committed suicide. All students are under lock down and I’ve been able to text Jenny, who is safe in a professor’s office with other students.

When I was in high school, I wrote a paper called- “Punk, Rock and All That Jazz.” There was some speculation at the time (a lot of it by the Big H) punk music caused young people to become violent and disillusioned. My final word on the subject was this- no media can influence you to such an extent if you weren’t a bit off to begin with.

I still believe this. The problem is, mental illness either seems to be rampant these days among young people- or it’s just there are finally diagnoses available. I remember when my parents were young; you were either crazy or you weren’t. There wasn’t much in the way of differentiation. Now, you have ADD, ADHD, tons of personality disorders- some dangerous, some harmless- depression and anxiety. Where is it all coming from?

I have a theory. As parents seem to be consumed with their own lives- I see children being less and less engaged with their nuclear family. We are plugged in to electronics and unplugged from one another. We are more concerned with social media than being social. Our children are growing up without the connections with people- they are digesting massive doses of inappropriate media (movies, TV, video games, comic books, music, Hollywood) and it is EVERYWHERE.

Young people are being bombarded with negative messages, held to impossible learning standards, asked too much of academically, expected to look perfect and HAVE everything. It’s become the new death by consumption. The pressure is one for kids to have it all- be everything to everyone- in order to compete. This pressure coupled with disconnection in their environment leads to loneliness and stress.

If children turn to music, video games and Hollywood as the most substantial source of cultural literacy- their views will become slanted no doubt. However, in my estimation, there is a big leap from shooting people in video games to shooting people in real life. It would take someone not mentally sound to be influenced to such an extent.

HOWEVER- I do believe there is limitless damage that can be done to children witnessing intense violence. It desensitizes them to it making them able to tolerate more and more- we lose compassion in this. A child who might not be strong mentally to begin with is a time bomb.

Parents are So Very NOT Clever if they let their young children watch violent programs and movies- or to play excessively violent video games. Such exposure can "reset' the normalcy button for a young person. "Oh, if you’re pissed off at a classmate- just kill them- I see it on TV all of the time." Children develop the ability to recognize consequences, and if you have a child who has never been held accountable- consequences won’t factor into bad decision making.

I’ve mentioned this before- when I was in high school- a cheerleader from a neighboring town left the house to walk her dog before school. She was following her daily routine when she was shot in the chest by the 11-year-old neighbor boy who wanted to "see what it was like to shoot someone for real."

Now- do "normal" children think this way? No. But children who are a little off and are exposed to intense violence in media can be influenced and desensitized to such an extent it seems well within "normal" to kill or maim.

The joy they take when they "kill" their opponents on a video game could be escalated to a real-life playing field. I believe that Hollywood and media contributed to Columbine and maybe every single "Columbine" there after- and I believe parents are the first line of defense against these messages.

There is no doubt there are those children who are born bad, poorly wired, mentally ill and beyond help- but their problems will be identified early teachers and family friends even if the parents are not willing to see the problems for what they are. A Clever parent will listen. We have enough sociopaths out there.

I think I am going to run an "Indecent Proposal" series. My outlandish thoughts for righting some wrongs.

Enough out of me today.

This and That- But Mostly Football

I need to preface this post and all those that I write between now and October 1st with the notification that my editor, Alisa, is relaxing somewhere on a cruise ship. It seems unfair she would not only leave me but leave me with typos, grammatical errors and- gasp- punctuation issues! You will see rampant use of the "dash" while she is gone and I will take hell for it when she returns.

OK, Clever Girls, University of Michigan might not be your team, and I am sure everyone is tired of me going on and on about my Wolverines, but history is being made here and it’s important for you to read sports-related blurbs because whether or not you or anyone else likes UM- the following names are going to come up time and again this season: Rich Rodriguez and Denard Robinson- RichRod and D-Rob, respectively. A So Very Clever Guy's Girl will know all about this.

Why? Because RichRod came from West Virginia, where he did an impressive job coaching though the translation to UM has been rocky to say the least. He came in insisting he implement a spread offense and we didn’t have the right players to execute it. Finally, his ass and his job are about to be saved by a young man named Denard.

In order to execute a spread option, you need a quick, intuitive, efficient and highly mobile quarterback who can handle the shotgun (the center pitches the ball to the quarterback) and play under center (the center hands the ball off to the quarterback). In the ideal (what UM has with D-Rob at the helm) scenario, you have a solid pocket (the protection area for the quarterback made up of the offensive linemen) giving your quarterback plenty of time to find a receiver or hand off the ball.

D-Rob elevates this set up by having little concern for whether or not the pocket will collapse- if he is unable to execute the desired play he runs for daylight. He doesn’t just find holes- he creates them. Impressive, explosive- which is why I am jacked out of shape about his bruised left knee. RichRod says he is going to play this weekend, but his knee isn’t going to get a break for a couple weeks.

Why else is history being made? Well, two years ago UM had two walk-on quarterbacks and now we have THREE viable options and they all are young boys. I thought for sure they would red-shirt Tate Forcier, but D-Rob’s injury forcie’d a quick decision and Tate now owns a bit of UM football history having completed 12 of 12 passes- an efficiency record for UM. Fantastic- so glad he is being given a chance to redeem himself after the disaster last year. I will never hang the miserable record on Tate. Fact is- he was not the person to lead the charge on an offensive strategy RichRod was forcing. It is, in part, the coach’s job to admit failure- you can’t implement a play style if you don’t have the right players for the job. He should have put more effort into recruiting and found the right players. We suck in recruiting- we got lucky with Denard and perhaps a national championship will help us to regain some of our former glory we deserve as the winningest college football team in history. My gosh, we should have players banging on our doors like UT does. It’s embarrassing.

Now- about those Hogs. The only silver lining to that cloud is that Mallett messed up in the end getting picked off (throwing an interception). The Heisman race is hot already, Clever Girls- so the names Mark Ingram (Alabama), Ryan Mallett (Arkansas) and Denard are going to be coming up a lot. The Arkansas loss will keep Denard at the top of the Heisman pundit poll despite the fact he only played for seven minutes he amassed almost 200 yards- if he’d stayed in that game we’d have hung a hundred on Bowling Green (there is a reason Corvette leaps to mind and not football- but a win is a win). The bad news? 'Bama rolls on and so does Mark Ingram, and the Heisman voters have been itching for another back-to-back Heisman winner. Hell, Archie Griffin was the last one and Sam Bradford blew his chance with an injury.

Just to manage your expectations- you can count on a weekend wrap-up Monday and a gameday post Friday. It’s just through college football season- don’t panic. More good news- Soupfest is October 9th and I've actually brought someone into the fold to simply write down the recipes. They will be coming your way to carry you through football season and chilly northern winters. Yum.

I’m trying to decide how I should commemorate one year of So Very Clever. The anniversary is in two days. Hmmm. Any ideas?

I’d like to thank my new readers for their interest and a special thank you to my So Very Loyal readers.

If you are interested in the progress on "Consumed," check out my fiction site at www.lidestrigriffin.com.

A Clever Way Out of Paying for Your Wedding Photos

OK, Clever Tribe- it’s time to start putting our heads together and sell some books. As you know, my first novel, "Consumed," is available for presale on bn.com. It can be purchased now but will be shipped mid-December.

I want to reward those of you who are loyal readers of Clever, and/or your family memberfs and friends. So, I am going to run a contest.

This is how it will work: If you or anyone you know is getting married in December of 2010 or in any month in 2011- this is something you want to get involved in.

The RULES-

1. You have to become a fan of Clever Girl on Facebook. I'll cross check your name with your e-mail.
2. You have to e-mail me at soveryclevergrl@gmail.com and tell me the bride and groom’s names, and the date and location of the wedding. After this, I will return the e-mail and give you a contest code. This number will allow me to keep track of all your entries.
3. Refer all your friends and relatives (hell, everyone on your invite list, co-workers etc. …) to http://www.soveryclever.com-/ where they will read and comment daily between now and the 31st of October. They will begin each comment with your order code.
4. You (bride or groom) and all of your referrals must then purchase "Consumed" athttp://www.bn.com/ and e-mail your receipt to soveryclevergrl@gmail.com- use your contest code in the subject line. When your friends, family members and co-workers order "Consumed" from http://www.bn.com-/ they have to forward the receipt tosoveryclevergrl@gmail.com with your contest code in the subject line (this will be your proof of purchase to be added to the bride's total count).
5. So, to recap. In order to qualify for the contest you must become a fan of Clever Girl on FB (encourage all your friends and family members to do the same)- e-mail me atsoveryclevergrl@gmail.com and introduce yourself- give me all the details pertinent to your wedding (or your sister’s wedding or you mother’s wedding- whom ever you are supporting). Every day, all of your people need to log ontohttp://www.soveryclever.com/, read the blog and leave comments. All comments have to begin with your contest code so I can add it to your profile. Each person who buys "Consumed" between now and the 31st of October will give you another chance to win. All receipts from http://www.bn.com/need to be e-mailed to soveryclevergrl@gmail.comwith your contest code in the subject line.

WHAT DO YOU WIN?

In case you didn’t know, I am a professional photographer as well. I have been shooting weddings all over the world for 13 years and simply LOVE it. You can preview my wedding website at www.lidestriphoto.com. At the end of October, I will be offering the person who has followed the rules and referred the most people to Clever Girl and whose "team" has purchased the most copies of "Consumed" wedding photography any where in the country free of charge. Now, this is a $7,000 value. It will include me photographing your wedding for seven hours (continuous time) and giving you a disc of all the images. You will own them and therefore be able to do with them as you wish. I will handle all my own travel expenses.

As an added bonus- anyone in Dallas who refers one hundred people (each referral must also buy "Consumed") will be eligible for an engagement or family sitting (all images on disc). Within one hour from Dallas proper.

So, tell all of your friends who are getting married!! I’m really excited to do this- and thank you so much for your continued support.

Game Day Action

Well! The results of the Heisman Pundit poll are in for week four- hmm. Clever Girls, you need to know this is a mini-Heisman vote of only 13 of the regular voters and is considered the most accurate pre-Heisman Trophy Trust vote.

Denard Robinson is 13 points above the next two tied QBs- Terrelle Pryor (nemesis from Ohio State) and Kellan Moore (of Boise State)- IMPRESSIVE.

Now, UM is not as strong a team as they need to be, nor is the offense yet to respond to RichRod’s spread offense- however, Denard Robinson (D-Rob) is a much better QB to execute RichRod's spread option, as he's highly mobile, agile and exceedingly comfortable carrying the ball. He's absolutely riveting to watch- explosive. If he had a solid offensive line- we’d look like the Longhorns under Colt or Vince. That would be a fantasy come true.

Looks like Tate Forcier is on the path to being a red-shirt freshman this year- Clever Girls this is one way to add a year of eligibility to a player. If they go an entire season without playing a down- they are given an extra year. Now, why would this transpire? A couple of reasons- perhaps the player was active in their freshman year (a true freshman), but due to injury, attitude or performance was not as qualified as another player their sophomore year, but the coach knows they will become a stronger player and wants to develop that talent. OR, they got ousted from their job by an incoming player the next year. It seems that was the case with Forcier and Robinson. It happens. But those are two definitions any Clever Girl needs to know.

Michigan has two more relatively easy weeks- then homecoming vs. Michigan State- a bye week- and then they get hit hard for the rest of the season. So, theoretically, Denard could remain in the top of the Heisman polling for the next four weeks! Obviously, the homecoming game will be a tough one for me. I still root for UM, but am happy (ish) either way.

NOW- to challenge a term I love- "The best defense is a good offense." In the case of UM- this is not true. No matter how good D-Rob is playing, he can not carry a team and if the defense does not stop the opponent- we lose. So, the defense has GOT to pull it together. This is absurd. When we start confronting some of the opponents who are offensive powerhouses- it might be a high-scoring game- but we will lose.

OK- coolest game of the week? I’ll be watching UM, UT and Arkansas vs. Alabama. I’ve made no secret of the fact I want 'Bama to get rolled early so it’s time for Arkansas and Ryan Mallet to live up to the hype. What does that mean, Clever Girls? Well, offensively Ryan Mallet (QB for Arkansas) and Mark Ingram (RB of 'Bama and reigning Heisman champion) will be struggling for honors- so, it will be a fantastic battle.

It’s really next weekend I am looking forward to. Texas OU is one of the most exciting weekends of the year for me. This year will be a little different- I will be at Dick’s Last Resort with ESPN Austin as they broadcast live on Friday. Cannot wait to see Chip, Geoff, Erin and Sean- this is a fantastically handsome bunch, ladies, so round up your men and join them.