Is he listening? Mmmm. It depends on what you are saying.
With men, what you say is as important as how you say it. Perhaps the reason you didn’t get that second date was because on the first one the poor bastard nearly slipped into a boredom-induced coma over dinner as you talked incessantly about work, why you switched manicurists or your sister’s divorce.
If he can’t work in his favorite topic – himself - no matter how gorgeous you are, you might be doomed. If his attempts to introduce his interests were met with a complete lack of knowledge and interest, you can count on not hearing from him again. If you are full-time hot, and part time borefest- it will catch up to you. Be advised, if you are full-time hot- he will still probably have sex with you- but you can count on little to no follow up outside of sex.
Why didn’t that guy from the party call? You were banking on it. Think back. Can you pinpoint the moment his eyes began to dart about as if looking for an exit? Was it while you were arguing with him about abortion, lecturing him on politics or unfurling your complicated family history? While TOO MUCH INFORMATION is an overused phrase, it is overused because TOO MANY PEOPLE SHARE TOO MUCH INFORMATION.
It doesn't matter whether he's your father, your brother, your date or your business associate- he does NOT want to hear about the fight you got into with your mother about your cousin's wedding- UNLESS, said fight occurred while you were driving a Ferrari Enzo on the 405 at rush hour in a high speed chase with LAPD after you tripled the speed limit on that quarter mile of unfettered pavement. Even then, you will want to keep the details of the argument to a minimum. Nor does he want to hear about that lovely play you and your BFF attended that afternoon- UNLESS, said play occurred on a stage in the sky and the characters were fighter jets. Get it?
Speak a man’s language and he will listen. How? Aren't you sick of all the "self-help" books that tell you what to STOP doing? What to STOP eating, drinking, and where to STOP going? I know I am. So, I am here to help you START doing, START experiencing, and START learning.
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Clever, I think you need to add a spot on your blog for readers to post some ideas for you. Here is an oldie but goodie from a study posted in 2003.
ReplyDeleteWomen who perform the act of fellatio and swallow semen on a regular basis, one to two times a week, may reduce their risk of breast cancer by up to 40 percent, a North Carolina State University study found.
Hmmmm, makes ya wonder?
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OMG- who sponsored this study? Penthouse? Hustler? Hahaha. You can email me from here- I'm pretty sure and you can do it like this. I'll check out the study.
ReplyDeleteDoes it matter who the woman fellates? Because if this is part of the married male agenda to surmount the "birthday you know what" it won't work- if she does it once a year, this study isn't going to change it.
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CLEVER, here ya go!
ReplyDeleteAP) -- Women who perform the act of fellatio and swallow semen on a regular basis, one to two times a week, may reduce their risk of breast cancer by up to 40 percent, a North Carolina State University study found.
Doctors had never suspected a link between the act of fellatio and breast cancer, but new research being performed at North Carolina State University is starting to suggest that there could be an important link between the two.
In a study of over 15,000 women suspected of having performed regular fellatio and swallowed the ejaculatory fluid, over the past ten years, the researchers found that those actually having performed the act regularly, one to two times a week, had a lower occurance of breast cancer than those who had not. There was no increased risk, however, for those who did not regularly perform.
"I think it removes the last shade of doubt that fellatio is actually a healthy act," said Dr. A.J. Kramer of Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, who was not involved in the research. "I am surprised by these findings, but am also excited that the researchers may have discovered a relatively easy way to lower the occurance of breast cancer in women."
The University researchers stressed that, though breast cancer is relatively uncommon, any steps taken to reduce the risk would be a wise decision.
"Only with regular occurance will your chances be reduced, so I encourage all women out there to make fellatio an important part of their daily routine," said Dr. Helena Shifteer, one of the researchers at the University. "Since the emergence of the research, I try to fellate at least once every other night to reduce my chances."
The study is reported in Friday's Journal of Medical Research.
In 1991, 43,582 women died of breast cancer, as reported by the National Cancer Institute.
Dr. Len Lictepeen, deputy chief medical officer for the American Cancer Society, said women should not overlook or "play down" these findings.
"This will hopefully change women's practice and patterns, resulting in a severe drop in the future number of cases," Lictepeen said.
Sooner said the research shows no increase in the risk of breast cancer in those who are, for whatever reason, not able to fellate regularly.
"There's definitely fertile ground for more research. Many have stepped forward to volunteer for related research now in the planning stages," he said.
Almost every woman is, at some point, going to perform the act of fellatio, but it is the frequency at which this event occurs that makes the difference, say researchers. Also key seems to be the protein and enzyme count in the semen, but researchers are again waiting for more test data.
The reasearch consisted of two groups, 6,246 women ages 25 to 45 who had performed fellatio and swallowed on a regular basis over the past five to ten years, and 9,728 women who had not or did not swallow. The group of women who had performed and swallowed had a breast cancer rate of 1.9 percent and the group who had not had a breast cancer rate of 10.4 percent.
"The findings do suggest that there are other causes for breast cancer besides the absence of regular fellatio," Shafteer said. "It's a cause, not THE cause."
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ReplyDeleteThank you for doing my research for me and issuing forth this truly provocative study. As far as studies done by colleges, you can find just about anything you are looking for, so get to work locating the one which PROVES, or at least makes a strong case for, the tremendous health benefits of a "happy ending" a day.
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